It’s been a whirlwind of a month, as September usually is. We haven’t had too much down time with me doing my business stuff after supper most nights, but we’ve managed to fit in a few Star Trek: The Next Generation episodes.
I’ve been coming to a little bit of peace about the state of our messy house. If you’ve come to visit, you’ll likely know that there is food on the floor by the table (namely by the kids seats), there are books and toys strewn about the living room and den, clothes seemly tossed carelessly onto the floor, couch, chair – wherever they might fly to, and the floors – the floors hardly look swept at all.
I have struggled with this daily. I hate feeling like we live in a pig-sty. I hate it when I try to find something only to find that it’s gone ‘missing’. And I really get peeved off when the kidlets get into our cooking utensils and we can no longer find them or rearrange a particular cupboard and all hope of finding the food I need for a quick supper is lost. It’s frustrating. It’s maddening. It wears me thin.
I decided to reexamine what is going on here that creates this pig-sty and try to make improvements where I can. The result was not what I expected. In this examination, I realised that I am actively making a choice to ignore the mess to (typically) be with my kids or tend to their needs. Potty training doesn’t happen on its own, most cries typically need a Mama intervention, stories need to be read, and teeth come through one’s gums in a most painful way. The mess is still here. It’s still frustrating at times, and it still drives me crazy when I can’t find what I’m looking for. But I feel more at peace with the mess now because I’ve realised that the mess is not more important than my kids, who truly do actively need me during most of the day.
The mess can wait until later. Or it can visit for a long time. I don’t like it, but I will allow it to reside here as long as my kids are receiving the love they have the right to receive from their Mama. The mess gets no lovin’ from me.